There are a handful of truly memorable moments I have in my life and one was made today.
Today we had a preschool promotion for our little girl who will begin kindergarten in 6 short weeks. I really went into the whole thing thinking it would be cute, but not giving much thought to the fact that I would SOB like a baby at one point in the presentation. After all, I had been hearing the songs they were singing for over a month and I had seen her class perform songs at Christmas. This was a fun event. But what I heard and saw from my sweet and precious girl will be forever burned in my mind, heart, & soul. (And my amazing husband managed to capture it on video.)
Before I show it to you let me explain some insecurities. For the longest time I truly believed that my "value" was on how I performed in school, the degrees I held, how many people I could help in my social work positions, how I moved up in my employment, etc. Then I became a mom and knew that I wanted to stay home, but the switch was tricky. I realize how important my mom job is, but sometimes I fall back into the old definition of value and feel that I have less value because I am "just" a stay at home mom. After all no one is proclaiming my deeds of cleaning up meal after meal, completing load after load of laundry, reading "Owl Babies" for the millionth time, reminding little people to eat with their fork, use the potty, and clean the potty, before other co-workers where I get a little certificate. :) But this video and the sound of my beautiful girl's voice is more than I could ever ask for. I will let you see the video because yes, I am just that proud.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
In the Blink of an Eye
I have shed several tears over the past 24 hours and most of them for people I do not even personally know.
I have cried out to God about amount of pain that others are going through. A tragic car accident took a young grandmother, her granddaughter and left the mommy to be and unborn baby in serious condition. I know members of this family and am truly heartbroken for them and cry out to God on their behalf. At the same time I received a phone call about this, I was reading a journal about a young boy and his regimen of radiation and chemo at such a young age and I cried as I read his mother's words and again my heart went out. And then there is a wonderful father with kids and a beautiful wife, again, fighting with cancer. There are several more stories like these everyday.
I cry out to the Lord and ask why these people have so much suffering and I am left with no answer other than "I am not done yet". I believe and know that the Lord can bring beauty from pain. I was talking to my mom about the tragic event and she told me two stories from her Beth Moore study. The first involves 4 missionary woman that were serving in Iraq. Three of them died and when the fourth came to, she asked "Did they make it?" And the answer was no, they died. The pastor at the memorial service turned this around and said that the three woman were now in all His glory in heaven asked "Did she make it?" And the answer was no. . she is not here yet.
The second story is about Beth Moore stating that she likes everything wrapped up in a nice bow. And let's face it, who doesn't want things all tied up, no loose ends, something that is beautifully packaged, clean, neat. But that is not how God works. If you look through the bible and the stories of the patriarchs and the Israelites, the promise land was not all packaged in a nice bow. Jesus' death was not all packaged in a nice bow. It was painful there was the unknown, questioning, grumbling, weeping, utter fear. But God still had His hand there. Beth Moore is right. . .God doesn't tie it up for us and give it to us neat, He ties it all together.
In a blink of eye things change, diagnoses are given, people die, pain occurs. I am choosing to believe that God is there putting it all together in his Sovereign ways.
I have cried out to God about amount of pain that others are going through. A tragic car accident took a young grandmother, her granddaughter and left the mommy to be and unborn baby in serious condition. I know members of this family and am truly heartbroken for them and cry out to God on their behalf. At the same time I received a phone call about this, I was reading a journal about a young boy and his regimen of radiation and chemo at such a young age and I cried as I read his mother's words and again my heart went out. And then there is a wonderful father with kids and a beautiful wife, again, fighting with cancer. There are several more stories like these everyday.
I cry out to the Lord and ask why these people have so much suffering and I am left with no answer other than "I am not done yet". I believe and know that the Lord can bring beauty from pain. I was talking to my mom about the tragic event and she told me two stories from her Beth Moore study. The first involves 4 missionary woman that were serving in Iraq. Three of them died and when the fourth came to, she asked "Did they make it?" And the answer was no, they died. The pastor at the memorial service turned this around and said that the three woman were now in all His glory in heaven asked "Did she make it?" And the answer was no. . she is not here yet.
The second story is about Beth Moore stating that she likes everything wrapped up in a nice bow. And let's face it, who doesn't want things all tied up, no loose ends, something that is beautifully packaged, clean, neat. But that is not how God works. If you look through the bible and the stories of the patriarchs and the Israelites, the promise land was not all packaged in a nice bow. Jesus' death was not all packaged in a nice bow. It was painful there was the unknown, questioning, grumbling, weeping, utter fear. But God still had His hand there. Beth Moore is right. . .God doesn't tie it up for us and give it to us neat, He ties it all together.
In a blink of eye things change, diagnoses are given, people die, pain occurs. I am choosing to believe that God is there putting it all together in his Sovereign ways.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Date Night
I will only say a few words and let the pictures explain the rest, but Jeff took his little girl on their first formal date tonight. Our church does a father/daughter dinner and dance. This year's theme was "I Bear His Name". I got to go dress shopping with her last week and tonight was the night she has been looking forward to all week. Daddy came to the door, rang the door bell, gave her a beautiful single red rose, and off they went in his car. Oh and it is meaningful that they went in his car, because currently not all 5 of us can fit in Daddy's car because of car seats. So here you go. . . these make my heart melt!
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Be a friend to get one?!?
So as you might have read in earlier posts, I have been reading a book called Bo's Cafe. It is a great book, I just seem to never have time to read. Shocking, I know.
I think that maybe reading it slow has been a blessing to me as I tend to look at my life as the characters look at their lives.
Basically I have been pondering authentic living. At first glance I would say. . of course I am authentic. I have always said "what you see is what you get". But as I look closer and have some conversations I can see that I am not all that authentic.
My sister and I were talking the other day. She has been blessed by several friends with offers lending meals and helping hands towards the end of her pregnancy and now that she now has a newborn and a very active preschooler. She was saying she just hates to "bother" others. She knows they offer, but doesn't want to take advantage of them. In turn I told her what my mother tells me and I know, but don't always do "Take them up on it. If they didn't want to help, they wouldn't offer!" I know that when I offer I want people to take me up on it! As the words came out of my mouth I began to think about my offers and authentic living. I will try to make the connection for you.
I am sure you have heard you need to be the friend you want to get. Really!?!?! So if I look at myself, do I really want a imperfect, slightly overweight, hugging my kids only to yell at them the next hour, messing housewife, totally crazy, somewhat inconsistent, kind hearted, God fearing, thankful I get to try it again tomorrow woman? And my answer these days YES I DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want a friend like that. If I attract friends the way I "fake" life, that means I would get a distant, not going to let you in, pretend my marriage, kids, life are doing just find. And I don't want to "do life" with someone like I am acting.
I want to know a person's struggles, I want to pray for them, love on them, love on their family. I want to be able to cry with them and have them cry with me. I want them to help me but know I will make horrible blunders and love me anyway. I want them to know my kids fight, that I don't always talk nicely to them, that I lose my patience. I want someone to know those things, and I want to know their "things". And do life with GRACE.
So maybe the phrase should be if you want a authentic friend, be an authentic person.
I think that maybe reading it slow has been a blessing to me as I tend to look at my life as the characters look at their lives.
Basically I have been pondering authentic living. At first glance I would say. . of course I am authentic. I have always said "what you see is what you get". But as I look closer and have some conversations I can see that I am not all that authentic.
My sister and I were talking the other day. She has been blessed by several friends with offers lending meals and helping hands towards the end of her pregnancy and now that she now has a newborn and a very active preschooler. She was saying she just hates to "bother" others. She knows they offer, but doesn't want to take advantage of them. In turn I told her what my mother tells me and I know, but don't always do "Take them up on it. If they didn't want to help, they wouldn't offer!" I know that when I offer I want people to take me up on it! As the words came out of my mouth I began to think about my offers and authentic living. I will try to make the connection for you.
I am sure you have heard you need to be the friend you want to get. Really!?!?! So if I look at myself, do I really want a imperfect, slightly overweight, hugging my kids only to yell at them the next hour, messing housewife, totally crazy, somewhat inconsistent, kind hearted, God fearing, thankful I get to try it again tomorrow woman? And my answer these days YES I DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want a friend like that. If I attract friends the way I "fake" life, that means I would get a distant, not going to let you in, pretend my marriage, kids, life are doing just find. And I don't want to "do life" with someone like I am acting.
I want to know a person's struggles, I want to pray for them, love on them, love on their family. I want to be able to cry with them and have them cry with me. I want them to help me but know I will make horrible blunders and love me anyway. I want them to know my kids fight, that I don't always talk nicely to them, that I lose my patience. I want someone to know those things, and I want to know their "things". And do life with GRACE.
So maybe the phrase should be if you want a authentic friend, be an authentic person.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Disneyland Vacation and Lauren's 5th Birthday
We just got back from Disneyland to celebrate Lauren's upcoming 5th birthday.
Jeff and I decided a while back that we would go to Disneyland for each child's 5th birthday and since Lauren will be 5 very soon. . it was time!
We had a wonderful time full of fun, family, extended family and laughter!
Above this post are many, many pictures to prove it!!! :)
Jeff and I decided a while back that we would go to Disneyland for each child's 5th birthday and since Lauren will be 5 very soon. . it was time!
We had a wonderful time full of fun, family, extended family and laughter!
Above this post are many, many pictures to prove it!!! :)
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